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Mediation · the meaning

What is mediation?

Mediation is a way of resolving a dispute in which an impartial third person, the mediator, helps the people involved communicate and reach their own agreed decisions[1]. It is voluntary, and the mediator neither decides the outcome nor gives advice[1]. The family court rules treat it as one form of non-court dispute resolution[2].

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Last reviewed Sources checked

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Typical family MIAM, each[3]
Voucher-scheme families reaching agreement[4]
Money claims with required mediation, up to[5]
Civil courts can order ADR from[6]

01/ The meaning

Mediation meaning

In family mediation, the FMC's Code of Practice defines mediation as a process in which people going through a family breakdown appoint an impartial third person to help them communicate better and reach their own agreed and informed decisions, usually about separation, divorce, children, finance or property[1].

Outside family cases, the Civil Mediation Council describes it as parties in dispute negotiating a settlement with the help of an impartial third person[7]. The Ministry of Justice's guide to civil mediation calls it a flexible and confidential process for settling a dispute between people, businesses or organisations[8]. What makes it mediation is that the people in dispute, not the mediator, make the decisions[1].

02/ Principles

The principles of mediation

The FMC's Code of Practice sets out the principles every family mediator works to[1]:

  • Voluntary. Taking part is each person's free choice, and anyone, including the mediator, can withdraw at any time[1].
  • Impartial. The mediator must be even-handed between you and try to redress any imbalance of power[1].
  • Neutral about the outcome. The mediator must not steer you towards an outcome or predict what a court would do, and makes clear they are not giving advice[1].
  • Confidential. The mediator must not pass on what you say without consent, and discussions cannot be referred to in court, except financial facts and where someone is at risk of significant harm[9].
  • Focused on children. The mediator must have particular regard to the welfare of any children and encourage you to consider their wishes and feelings[10].

Workplace and civil mediation share several of these principles: Acas describes workplace mediation as voluntary, confidential and run by an impartial mediator[11], and in civil mediation what you say is "without prejudice" and cannot be used in court[8].

03/ Types

Family, workplace, civil and community mediation

Family mediation has its own professional body, the Family Mediation Council[12]; the Civil Mediation Council covers civil, commercial, workplace and other non-family mediation[7], including community and education mediation[13]. Choose the kind of dispute:

Family mediation deals with separation: arrangements for children, the family home and other property, pensions, maintenance and debts[1]. In England and Wales, family mediators are accredited through the Family Mediation Council[14], and anyone can call themselves a family mediator, so the FMC register is the place to check[15].

Before most court applications about children or money you must attend a MIAM[16]. A MIAM typically costs £120–£150 per person[3], legal aid can make it free[17], and a voucher of up to £500 can go towards sessions about children[18]. The rest of this page covers family mediation in depth; see also family mediation.

04/ How it works

How family mediation works, step by step

Open a step to read it.

  1. Family mediation usually starts with a separate information and assessment meeting for each of you[25], where the mediator explains the options and checks whether mediation is safe and suitable[26]. See what is a MIAM.

05/ Family mediation in depth

The ways family mediation can be run

Mediators can adapt the process: the number and length of sessions, how many mediators there are, whether it is online or in person, and whether you sit in the same or separate spaces[31]. Common models:

  • Together, in person or online. You can attend in person or remotely, and you do not have to be in the same room or call as your ex-partner[32]. Of the first families to use the voucher scheme, 88% mediated online[33].
  • Shuttle mediation. You sit in separate rooms and the mediator moves between you; National Family Mediation says it can take longer and cost more[34]. Separate rooms do not necessarily make mediation safe[35]. See shuttle mediation.
  • Hybrid or integrated mediation. Lawyers attend the sessions with you; the FMC says it is often used in financial cases and the costs can be high[28].
  • Child-inclusive mediation. Children aged 10 and over should be offered the chance to be heard directly, if they wish, by a mediator trained to do it[10]. See children in mediation.

If mediation is not right for you, the MIAM covers the alternatives too: solicitor negotiation, collaborative law, neutral evaluation and arbitration[36].

06/ Mediation and the courts

Can a court order mediation?

In family cases, no. The family court must consider at every stage whether non-court dispute resolution is appropriate, but the rules do not give it power to make you attend it[37]. Since April 2024 it can pause a case to encourage it, without your agreement[38], and you may have to file a form setting out your views on it[39]. In financial cases, failing without good reason to attend a MIAM or non-court process can count against you on costs[40].

In civil cases, yes. Since 1 October 2024 the Civil Procedure Rules have allowed the court to order the parties to engage in alternative dispute resolution, following the Court of Appeal's decision in Churchill v Merthyr Tydfil[6]. For small money claims, mediation is already a required step[5].

07/ Compared

Mediation, arbitration and court

The difference is who decides[41]:

How mediation differs from arbitration and court
Who decidesIs the outcome binding?
MediationYou both do; the mediator helps you reach your own decisions[1]In family cases, not on its own: a court can approve it as a consent order[30]. A signed civil settlement agreement is a binding contract[8]
ArbitrationAn arbitrator, after considering the evidence[41]Yes: you agree in advance to be bound, and the award is normally turned into a court order[41]
CourtA judge, with the child's welfare as the paramount consideration in children cases[42]Yes, it is a court order and can be enforced[43]

Neutral evaluation is different again: a legal professional gives an opinion on what a court might decide, which a mediator cannot do[44].

08/ What it is not

What mediation is not

  • It is not relationship counselling[45]; the mediator must explain how it differs from counselling, therapy and legal representation[1].
  • It is not legal advice: the mediator can explain options while making clear they are not giving advice, and tells you to take independent legal advice before a final agreement[1][46].
  • It is not always suitable: where there has been abuse or someone's safety is at risk, the mediator must not mediate if it is not safe[47]. See when mediation is not suitable.

09/ In family law

What is mediation in family law?

In family law, mediation is one of the ways of resolving a dispute other than through court[2]. The Family Procedure Rules call these "non-court dispute resolution", which includes mediation, arbitration, neutral evaluation and collaborative law[2].

The law builds mediation into the route to court: before most applications about children or finances, you must attend a mediation information and assessment meeting (MIAM)[16], conducted by a mediator the Family Mediation Council identifies as qualified[48]. The court must also consider at every stage whether non-court dispute resolution is appropriate[37], and since April 2024 it can pause a case to encourage it[38]. See mediation vs court.

10/ The agreement

What is a mediation agreement?

One document called a "mediation agreement" is the agreement to mediate, which you sign before the issues are discussed: it sets out the terms of the mediation, reflects the principles above and states the mediator's fees[1][27].

The other is the outcome, what you agree at the end, which in family mediation is usually written up as a Memorandum of Understanding, with an Open Financial Statement in money cases, or a parenting plan for children[29]. It is not legally binding on its own; to make it binding, a consent order is drafted and a court approves it[49][30]. See consent orders.

Civil mediation is different: the signed settlement agreement is itself a legally binding contract, and if a claim has already started, a consent order or "Tomlin order" can record it[8].

11/ Questions

Frequently asked questions

What is mediation?

A way of resolving a dispute in which an impartial mediator helps the people involved reach their own agreed decisions[1].

What does mediation mean in family law?

It is a form of non-court dispute resolution[2]. Most people applying to court about children or finances must first attend a MIAM, where mediation is explained[16].

Is a mediation agreement legally binding?

In family mediation, not on its own: it becomes binding if a court approves it as a consent order[30]. In civil mediation, a signed settlement agreement is a binding contract[8].

What is workplace mediation?

Acas describes it as a way to mend relationships when there is a disagreement at work, run by an impartial mediator; it is voluntary, confidential and usually not legally binding[11].

Can a court order mediation?

The family court can pause a case to encourage non-court dispute resolution but cannot make you attend it[38][37]. Civil courts can order parties to engage in it since 1 October 2024[6].

What is integrated or hybrid mediation?

A model in which lawyers attend the mediation sessions; the FMC says it is often used in financial cases and the costs can be high[28].

What is the difference between mediation and arbitration?

In mediation you decide together[1]. In arbitration an arbitrator decides, and you agree beforehand to be bound by the decision[41].

Do I have to mediate?

No. Mediation is voluntary[1], though you usually have to attend a MIAM before applying to court about children or money[50].

12/ Sources

Sources we checked

  1. Code of Practice for Family Mediators (v1.5, August 2025), sections 1, 4, 6 and 9 — Family Mediation Council
  2. Family Procedure Rules, Part 2, rule 2.3 — justice.gov.uk
  3. GOV.UK — mediation · FMC State of Family Mediation 2025 (PDF)
  4. Family Mediation Voucher Scheme analysis (March 2023) — Ministry of Justice, GOV.UK · The State of Family Mediation 2025 — Family Mediation Council
  5. Respond to a court claim for money: resolve the claim through mediation — GOV.UK
  6. The Civil Procedure (Amendment No. 3) Rules 2024 (SI 2024/839) — legislation.gov.uk
  7. What is mediation and how can it help me? — Civil Mediation Council
  8. A guide to civil mediation — Ministry of Justice, GOV.UK
  9. Code of Practice for Family Mediators (v1.5, August 2025), sections 5.2 and 6.5 — Family Mediation Council
  10. Code of Practice for Family Mediators (v1.5, August 2025), sections 5.3 and 6.6 — Family Mediation Council
  11. What mediation is and how it can help (Mediation at work) — Acas
  12. About us — Family Mediation Council · FMC Registration — Family Mediation Council
  13. Home: what is mediation and find a mediator — Civil Mediation Council
  14. Manual of Professional Standards and Self-Regulatory Framework (v1.6, August 2025), Part 1 — Family Mediation Council
  15. Why choose an FMC registered mediator? — Family Mediation Council
  16. legislation.gov.uk — CFA 2014 s10
  17. GOV.UK — mediation
  18. GOV.UK — Family Mediation Voucher Scheme · GOV.UK news, May 2026
  19. What mediation is and how it can help (Mediation at work) — Acas
  20. How Acas mediators work — Acas
  21. Introducing mediation at work — Acas · How Acas can help (Acas mediation support) — Acas
  22. What early conciliation is — Acas
  23. Civil and commercial mediation — Civil Mediation Council
  24. Resolving neighbour disputes: use a mediation service — GOV.UK
  25. FMC MIAM Standards (Aug 2022) PDF
  26. Family Procedure Rules, Part 3 — Ministry of Justice
  27. Code of Practice for Family Mediators (August 2025) — Family Mediation Council
  28. Mediation sessions — Family Mediation Council
  29. Helping participants realise an enduring outcome to family mediation — Family Mediation Council
  30. Get help agreeing (Money and property when you divorce or separate) — GOV.UK
  31. Family mediation in England and Wales: a guide for judges, magistrates, legal advisers and court staff (2024) — Family Justice Council and Family Mediation Council
  32. Make an agreement through mediation — GOV.UK
  33. Family Mediation Voucher Scheme analysis (March 2023) — Ministry of Justice, GOV.UK
  34. What is shuttle mediation? — National Family Mediation
  35. Good Practice Guidance for MIAMs, July 2024 — Family Mediation Council
  36. Good Practice Guidance for MIAMs, July 2024 — Family Mediation Council
  37. Family Procedure Rules, Part 3 — Ministry of Justice · Practice Direction 3A — Ministry of Justice
  38. FPR Part 3, r3.4
  39. GOV.UK — Form FM5 · Practice Direction 3A — justice.gov.uk
  40. justice.gov.uk FPR updates · SI 2023/1324
  41. A Guide to the Family Law Arbitration Scheme — Institute of Family Law Arbitrators
  42. Children Act 1989, section 1 — legislation.gov.uk
  43. Change or enforce an order (Making child arrangements if you divorce or separate) — GOV.UK
  44. Other ways to agree without going to court — GOV.UK
  45. Make an agreement through mediation (Making child arrangements if you divorce or separate) — GOV.UK
  46. Code of Practice for Family Mediators (v1.5, August 2025), section 9 — Family Mediation Council
  47. Standards for MIAMs (August 2022) — Family Mediation Council
  48. FPR Part 3, r3.1 · GOV.UK — child arrangements/mediation
  49. Make an agreement through mediation: what happens next and legal aid — GOV.UK
  50. FPR Part 3, r3.7

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