45–60 min
Meeting length
1-to-1
Never with your ex-partner
£120–£150
Typical cost
Neutral
Mediator takes no sides
What Is a MIAM Meeting?
A MIAM (Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting) is a private meeting between you and an authorised family mediator — required by section 10 of the Children and Families Act 2014 before most family court applications in England and Wales, unless an exemption applies.
Two things surprise most people, both set by FMC MIAM Standards:
- Your ex-partner will not be there. MIAMs are conducted separately with each person, so safeguarding and abuse concerns can be raised freely.
- It usually takes about an hour. Mediators must record reasons if a MIAM lasts under 45 minutes.
You can attend in person or by online video call — both are equally valid.
What Happens, Step by Step
Introductions and confidentiality
The mediator explains their role (neutral, not a judge or adviser), confidentiality and its limits (safeguarding concerns can be reported).
Safeguarding and suitability screening
Private questions about your relationship, any domestic abuse, and child welfare. This is required by FPR Rule 3.9 and FMC standards — answer honestly; it determines whether and how mediation can safely proceed.
Your situation and what you want to resolve
Child arrangements, finances, property — the mediator maps what is in dispute and what matters to you.
Your options, explained
Mediation (including shuttle and child-inclusive formats), other non-court dispute resolution (solicitor negotiation, collaborative law, arbitration), and court — with realistic costs and timescales for each.
Money: legal aid and the voucher
The mediator checks whether you may qualify for legal aid (which makes the MIAM free for both of you) and explains the £500 Family Mediation Voucher Scheme for children cases (extended until 31 March 2029).
Next steps
If mediation is suitable and you both want to try it, sessions are booked. If not — or if you choose court — the mediator signs the confirmation (the "MIAM certificate") your C100 needs.
How to Prepare
Nothing is legally required, but arriving prepared makes the hour far more useful:
- Know your priorities. What must be resolved first — living arrangements, school, holidays, money?
- Think about your children's routines and needs — mediators (and courts) focus on the children's welfare.
- Note key facts: dates of separation, current arrangements, income/assets if finances are in dispute.
- Prepare questions: fees per session, how many sessions they expect, voucher and legal aid eligibility, availability.
- Raise safety concerns privately. If there has been abuse, tell the mediator — mediation can be assessed as unsuitable, or safe formats (like shuttle mediation) considered. If you are in immediate danger call 999; the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is 0808 2000 247.
Prepare free with Miam
Our AI assistant can help you organise your thoughts, priorities and questions before the real meeting — free and confidential. She cannot replace the mediator or issue certificates.
Key Facts About the Meeting
| Fact | Detail | |------|--------| | Length | 45–60 minutes (FMC Standards) | | Cost | Typically £120–£150 per person; free with legal aid (GOV.UK) | | Format | In person or online video, always separate from your ex-partner | | Who runs it | Only FMC-authorised family mediators (FPR r3.1) | | Afterwards | Apply to court within 4 months, or the MIAM may need repeating (FPR r3.8(1)(d)) |
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I have to try mediation after the MIAM?
No. Mediation is voluntary. The MIAM only requires you to be informed and assessed. But note: since 29 April 2024 courts can adjourn proceedings to encourage non-court dispute resolution, and in financial cases an unreasonable refusal to mediate can affect costs orders (SI 2023/1324).
Can I bring someone with me?
Ask your mediator in advance. Because the MIAM must explore private safeguarding matters, mediators usually see you alone, but many will accommodate support needs (interpreters, disability support).
Will the mediator tell me what to do?
No — mediators are neutral and do not give legal advice or take sides. For legal advice, speak to a solicitor; for the process and your options, the MIAM is exactly the right place to ask.
What if the mediator says mediation is not suitable?
They will record that assessment and sign the confirmation you need for court. An unsuitability assessment does not count against you.
Sources & Further Reading
- FMC MIAM Standards (August 2022)
- Family Procedure Rules Part 3, r3.9 (conduct of MIAMs)
- GOV.UK — Making child arrangements: mediation
- Family Mediation Council — the MIAM
Content fact-checked against GOV.UK, the Family Procedure Rules and the Family Mediation Council: July 2026.
Walk In Prepared
Use Miam's free chat to organise your priorities and questions before your MIAM meeting.
AI Preparation Tool: Miam helps you prepare for your MIAM but cannot provide legal advice or issue certificates. Only FMC-accredited mediators can do that.
Related Guides
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All MIAM exemptions under Rule 3.8 FPR: domestic abuse evidence, urgency, child protection, previous MIAM within 4 months and more — with the April 2024 changes explained.